Slowing Down and Learning to Work With Yourself

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.

Lao Tzu

There is no denying that we live in a fast-paced society. Society tells us if we are to catch up to the freedom we yearn for, we need to be better workers to make more money. We are trained to get things done quickly and efficiently. Even at home, we are constantly bombarded with ads for products guaranteed to make life easier, so we have more time for the things we care about. But this only perpetuates a habit of efficiency. It is not training us to slow down but rather to speed up. 

Right now, you are likely in a rush; you may just not know it. You might be rushing to finish reading this so you can get to the grocery store, to work, to a meeting, to dinner, or maybe even to get that little bit of dopamine when your brain tells you you’ve done a good job today. 

But this is like chasing the magic dragon. We will never catch up. Peace and freedom aren’t found when we’ve accomplished something; it is found in the manner in which we live. It all depends on what habits you are practicing and which you are not. You may be what sustains your own stress. We need to learn to step in between stimulus and response before compounding it.

Our physiological state impacts how we feel. If you were to take a bunch of shallow, quick breaths as if you were hyperventilating, your body would become stressed and your mind anxious. However, if you instead took slow, deep breaths and repeat to yourself, ”It’s all ok,” you would become more relaxed.

Our goal is to become better at what we do, not through just our efficiency of the task but also in how we do it. Interestingly enough, relaxing into the action is what produces space, freedom, and peace. Even more so, we find our performance improves as well.

Think of the times you’ve been the most stressed in life. I doubt you had been laid back in a recliner chair with a cup of tea in hand. More likely than not, you were moving quickly from one task to another, feeling like you had to get it all done… or else.

You could be doing the most basic task, like tying your shoes, but if you had a drill Sergeant over you yelling, “FASTER! FASTER! FASTER!” you would fumble over the laces, and it would take you longer than if you had just gone at a slower pace. What’s worse is that you are in a state of panic all the while, thinking that you need to get this done quickly. But this is exactly what we do in our everyday lives. It is the act of thinking we have to move fast to get things done that makes them feel so hectic.

Mental strain can help us get going, but we are bound to suffer if we can’t turn it off. We will face constant anxiety, and our performance and overall enjoyment of life will decrease. As a matter of fact, going 100% slows us down. Even the fastest people in the world, Olympic sprinters, are told not to run 100%. So what do they do instead?

They discovered in the ’80s that an all-out sprint slows the runner down. When the gun goes off, a sprinter’s mindset determines their pace in the race. If they go all out, the runner uses muscles they don’t need to. In fact, the muscles work against one another rather than assist one another.

It would be like if two people were in a kayak paddling as hard as they could, but they were facing away from each other. Although they may be expelling more energy, they are completely stationary. 

The trick is the 85% rule. Instead of running all out, they are told to focus on running at 85% of their capacity. What happens is the muscles that are needed are used, but the ones that aren’t don’t activate, and as a result, they don’t work against the necessary muscles.

In moving at 85%, these runners look relaxed, and their speed looks effortless. Take a look at Usain Bolt when we runs. His head and neck are relaxed, his movements are fluid, and it seems easy for him. He’s not strained, and he often even has a smile mid-race. He relaxes both his body and mind.

However, we do the same thing as those kayakers. We think that by rushing, by moving at 100%, we accomplish more. But this sense of urgency only increases the mental strain we put on ourselves. Compounded over weeks, months, and years, we can quickly become tired and burned out (something that clearly none of us have ever felt).

As you finish with this, I want you to take a deep breath and notice how your mind tries to pull you this way and that. It says things like, “When we finish up here, we have to go help Eric with this, then we need to make sure to fold those clothes, and we can’t forget about the important phone call later, and what will we say on that, and did I make sure to lock the front door,” and on and on and on your mind will go.

This would be the two kayakers working against each other. You are so focused on what you have to do next that you cannot focus entirely on what you’re doing now. You can’t half-ass two things, whole ass one thing. Let’s instead bring a one-pointed focus to what you are doing now.

To do this, try something you may not have done before. Try to slow yourself down, so it feels like you’re going at 85% of your normal pace. Feel like you are moving in slow motion. For me, I actually try to make it feel like I’m moving at 50%. I’ve been in a habit for so long of moving quickly that I’ve had to over-exaggerate the exercise.

You’ll also notice how your mind is once again telling you, let’s move quicker, let’s get this done. You almost feel more anxious because you’ve slowed down. But over time, this will dissipate. 

It is our aim to become mindful of our physiological state. As you do this, you’ll soon notice that your movements have more flow to them. When you put dishes away, it almost becomes a dance that you become conscious of. As you type, it will feel like your fingers are gently moving across the keyboard. You’re becoming aware of your movements.

The most surprising thing is that when you start to move like this, you’ll find more peace in the activity you are doing. It feels far more relaxed. You no longer have the burden of go, go, go, go. Instead, it feels like a natural flow from one task to another. You’ll undoubtedly keep picking up the pace, and your mind will wander but bring it back to that slower feeling and know it’s ok.

When you go back to a normal-paced life, you’ll feel more mindful when you do quicken your pace. It is the act of attention and one-pointed awareness that lets us draw upon our brain’s full capacity. In slowing down, we see more. Taking time to accomplish the same goal not only gets you to the destination (often faster than when you’re rushing), but even more so, it allows you to enjoy the journey there. 

Life is nothing but the journey. We aren’t living so we can arrive at death quickly and efficiently, but living so we can experience and enjoy everything along the path we travel on. This is how we find peace and freedom in the mundane. This is falling in love with the process and, consequently, life itself.

Slow it all down and notice how much more vivid this world becomes.

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