We can easily become overwhelmed with life’s challenges. Sometimes we come up against big mountains in life, and we don’t know how we will overcome them. Even worse, it can feel like we are alone in this battle. It feels like it’s us versus the world time after time as life’s tests keep on coming.
But these tests are not meant to deter you from your dreams but to prepare you for them. They are your dojo, the training ground for your heart and mind. They are here to help instill the most important values and tools you need on this next leg of your journey.
Life challenges us to become better, to grow and learn. Like lifting weights and working out, internal growth is only found when we face resistance. Just because we’ve failed or haven’t found the success we’d hoped for doesn’t mean we won’t get to where we want to go.
Einstein said the most important question you will ask yourself is if this is a friendly universe. He went on to say, “The answer we find determines what we do with our lives. If the universe is a friendly place, we will spend our time building bridges. Otherwise, people use all their time to build walls. We decide.” The only difference between a friend and a foe is our perspective. In life, it is our view toward the events in it that determines if they will stop us in our tracks or propel us forward.
We can easily blame others or events for why things haven’t worked out for us, why we haven’t achieved what we wanted to, found the love we’ve searched for, or feel damaged by the journey through it all.
But we can just as easily say those are the reasons why we will succeed. Someone who knows heartbreak knows the importance and priority of a relationship. Someone who has failed on a project or business idea they had can take with them the lessons learned to make sure those mistakes aren’t made again. Someone who has lost a loved one will have a greater appreciation of time spent with those who are still here.
All of life’s lessons are learned through the experiences we face in it. It turns out you are far from alone in this journey through life. Life itself is conspiring to help you get to where you want to go, but only if you let it.
Think of the times when the right people, signs, or events came into your life the moment you needed them most. It may have been a friend that gave you the words of encouragement you needed, a smile from a stranger on the street, or the humility to see that one of your failures is what prepared you to succeed. Unfortunately, we often don’t know the importance of these moments until well after the fact. But try to notice when it happens in real-time. Sometimes we even see the most pivotal moments are not ones we choose but rather ones we were pushed into by a universal force.
An adventure is not an adventure if the hero stays home. It is when they receive the call to adventure and answer it, when they take their first step toward a new life, that that path begins to unfold seamlessly before them.
When we think of any story, in fact, we can see that the hero is only as brave as the evil villain or obstacle they are facing. We can see from our vantage point that our hero needs these obstacles and opponents to grow and become the best they can be. They are what push the hero day in and day out to learn what they are meant to. The greater the challenge, the more we fall in love with their journey.
This is what legends are made of; when people have to overcome something seemingly insurmountable, they find the strength to push through when it appears all hope is lost. And when they make it to the other side, we can see just how different they are from when they began.
But yet, we don’t have this same perspective in our own lives. So take a moment to think of the last big obstacle you overcame. What was it? How did it feel as you went through it? Did you have feelings of despair, possibly similar to the ones you are feeling now? What did you learn? How have you become different?
We get so caught up in our suffering that we can often feel alone in our struggles, that no one understands our pains, and we begin to doubt our path forward. But this is ok. This is the dark night. It is the palace we are tested to develop the courage and strength to face obstacles we previously thought we could not overcome. We forget to see that maybe we are meant to see something greater. Perhaps that is something within us.
Life is challenging you to become the best you can be. It can be easy to lose sight of this and ask, “Why me? Why do I have to go through this?” But if we flip the perspective: Why not you? Why can’t you be the person to handle this challenge and grow through it? Why can’t you be the person who makes your dreams a reality? Why can’t you live the life you’ve always wanted to?
You may be reading this and thinking about what you are currently facing, something that feels impossible to keep pushing through. You could be struggling to find time to balance work, kids, and time with loved ones. Maybe you just failed a new business venture, or you are taking a step toward your first one. Perhaps you are just burned out from life and are just trying to make it from one day to the next. But pause for a moment.
I challenge you to briefly rest in whatever you are facing and ask yourself what lessons you are learning or what you are meant to be learning. What you look for in earnest, you will find. So when you take the time to look, you’ll soon find better, more empowering ways of facing the same difficulties.
Stay focused on what you can control by shifting how you view what lies before you. This will be a superpower if you can master it, one that undoubtedly leads to internal growth and success in whatever avenues you pursue.
The hero never stays in their safe world but instead is pushed out into a new one, challenged to become something greater than they believed possible. Well, the same is true for you. You are the hero of your own story.
When you reach the other side of these obstacles, you’ll be able to turn back and bow to them. You can respect them for who they helped you become. This universe can be a friend if you let it. Life will test you, but when you realize that these tests are meant to help reveal your own potential, you’ll find yourself asking what can be learned rather than trying to avoid the pain.
There will be tough days, but you’ve got this. Stand back up. Take one more step toward your fears and ask what can be learned now, and now, and now.